Very sorry Neeka. In my situation - after my da died, I was raw with emotion, the reality with me all the time. But over time I began to 'adapt', to settle in to a world where - no, I did not accept or understand why it happened but was numb and could function. During that time when something reminded me of his recent death, or someone mentioned it - the wound was freshly poked with the singe of guilt. How could it be that my life was continuing in normalcy? And I was plummeted straight to a new kind of hell. Loss, mourning and survivorship guilt. My father believed that people 'lived' for as long as they were remembered, thought of, etc. Live long and tell everyone and your daughter stories about your papa.
Thank you for the remembrance... you remind all of us to honor our parents for the living they gave to us. May we truly honor their legacy through the work we do to make this world a better place for our own children. I have no doubt that your father was quite proud of his daughter, and that pride was arose apart from any of your great accomplishments.
May your papa be at peace. And may his vote, which you did exercise, count on Tuesday.
ReplyDeleteRay Charles rocks! Did your papa like him?
Very sorry Neeka. In my situation - after my da died, I was raw with emotion, the reality with me all the time. But over time I began to 'adapt', to settle in to a world where - no, I did not accept or understand why it happened but was numb and could function. During that time when something reminded me of his recent death, or someone mentioned it - the wound was freshly poked with the singe of guilt. How could it be that my life was continuing in normalcy? And I was plummeted straight to a new kind of hell. Loss, mourning and survivorship guilt. My father believed that people 'lived' for as long as they were remembered, thought of, etc. Live long and tell everyone and your daughter stories about your papa.
ReplyDeleteHello
Thank you for the remembrance... you remind all of us to honor our parents for the living they gave to us. May we truly honor their legacy through the work we do to make this world a better place for our own children. I have no doubt that your father was quite proud of his daughter, and that pride was arose apart from any of your great accomplishments.
ReplyDeleteVichnaya pamyat!
ReplyDeleteI hope your mom is doing ok. It must have been most difficult for her.
ReplyDelete